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I add NEW blog posts every week! Topics range from personal stories, current events, and new perspectives! I do not wish to share opinions; I only hope to share my thoughts with those who need it.
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“One thing is for sure, this journey is messy. But when we can take a step back we will see that this whole time we have been painting a much larger picture. In some areas, there are bright colors that represent the periods filled with light, splotches of grey that felt numb and lifeless, in other sections we will find the darkness we lived through. But when we see it all together, we can recognize that each color shows the range in which we feel and go through life.”
Today marks three years of recovery for me, and what amazes me the most is how quickly time is able to pass us by if we do not pay attention. This is what recovery has been about for me; paying attention. At first, what started out as realizing and admitting I had a substance use disorder, had now become a three-year recovery process of understanding…why. By showing up for my life, keeping myself accountable for my own choices, and learning how to express my emotions in a healthy manner, I have been able to see another day and live my best life in recovery.
In this post, I will share with you some of my biggest recovery struggles, and why this way of life is no easy feat. I will talk about what recovery has offered me thus far, and despite the challenge of it, why I would not live another way. Regardless of what it is you may be battling, recovery from anything is a day to day process. Recovery is simply choosing to want the best for yourself and your life, and getting honest about the things that pull you away from that.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
June has been the first month that I did not post each Saturday morning. I take that back. I guess that began the last week of May. My point is, June has been a month of self-reflection for me; more so than usual. I have been pondering what I have been wanting to do with this site moving forward, and the kind of content I want to provide and support. I have been reevaluating what is important to me and the direction I see for myself as a person. I am telling you this because I think it is important for everyone to reflect on the person they have become, and where they are headed. That was the overall theme for me in the month of June.
In this recap, I share some of the truths I was able to uncover and learn about myself this past month. If what I share speaks to you on a deeper level, or a bit closer to home, maybe it is time for you to take a look inward, and see if you are living life true to yourself, and your purpose. Maybe, just maybe, there is something I discovered this month that you needed to read at this point in your life. Whether or not that is the case, I appreciate you for being here anyways.
With the recent passing of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, the topic of Suicide and Mental Illness has taken a front row seat in the news. It is unfortunate that it must take these kinds of extremes to get people talking, but I am a firm believer in these being the kinds of conversations that we need to be having more of. In a world filled with so much suffering, there has got to be a way for us to discuss these kinds of issues. By remaining available, as well as vulnerable, to those closest to us, we can begin creating a ‘safe space’ for those that are desperately just trying to be heard, seen, and felt.
In this post, I share my thoughts on Suicide and I suggest ways that we can ALL get better at when it comes to paying attention to the people in our lives and those around us. Suicide is a dark topic, but we need to know that there can be a light shed on it. We do that by talking about it, reading about it, and doing what we can to understand it to the best of our abilities. This is just my attempt at doing that through my own knowledge, and experience with it.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
I am going to be honest…I have been struggling to figure out the direction I want to take Healing Hopefuls. I started this page because I wanted to create a safe place for anyone who may need one. At some point along the way, I think I forgot what I was writing for in the first place. I write as a way to understand myself, and hopefully heal along the way. By speaking my truth, sharing my insight, and owning up to my ugly, I aim to connect with strangers who have ever felt ‘broken’ in some way. So, with that said, I wanted to create an ‘End of the Month Recap’.
What can you expect in these posts? Bits of knowledge I felt ‘moved’ to share with YOU, epiphanies that I was quick enough to ‘grab’ and write down, as well as food for thought, and potentially a new perspective for you to consider. There really are no rules to this thing, and if I am able to help others while helping myself, I am going to do just that. Spreading ideas, starting conversations, and creating our own theories is important to do on an individual level. These are just some of the thoughts I put down on paper to share with anyone who may need them.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
There are going to be books that you come across in life where you feel compelled to share it with others. The kind of book that you know WILL help everyone for the better. This is one of those books. Aubrey Marcus, Founder, and CEO of Onnit, as well as New York Times Bestselling Author of Own the Day, Own Your Life is someone that you should pay attention to. He has an important message to share with the world, and as far as I am concerned, he is saying all the right things.
This post is all about giving credit where credit is due. Own the Day, Own Your Life is a book that can change the way we approach our life and the 24 hours we are given in a day. Not only does Aubrey offer you a realistic solution to an ongoing problem, but he sets it up in a way that is easy to follow, and worth doing one day at a time. This book is for you if you are ready for the change in your life that you deserve.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
Last year for Mother's Day weekend, I wrote a letter to my Mom to express some of the things I have never been any good at saying out loud. I decided to reshare that blog this week since the message behind it still remains true to this day.
In this personal post, I write to the woman who is half of the equation for who I am today. It has been a bumpy 26 years, but she has always remained my Mom through the worst of it.
I haven't been the easiest daughter to raise, but because of her, I have learned what is important in life.
To all of the Mom's out there, whether you be single mom's, single dad's, or a loving guardian, YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT, and you deserve so much more than one day.
Happy Day Before Mother's Day! ❤️
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
It’s #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth, and you know what that means…I am going to write about it! Except this time, I am doing things a little differently; I am writing a letter directly to Depression.
If you have spent any part of your life having to overcome the battle of this mental illness, you will understand this letter on a deeper level. If you have never experienced the struggle that is depression, then I urge you to read this letter so you can try to understand. Depression takes on many forms, and it has this cruel way of making everything seem fine to the outside world when in reality, the person suffering is having to fight a constant internal battle.
For me, writing about my own experiences, and sharing the struggles that I face has been a key component in my own mental health recovery. I hope by reading this letter you feel better knowing you are not alone, or you are able to take something away from it so you can empathize with those in your life who do suffer from depression.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
It took me a long time to admit that I needed to talk to a professional. I had come to a point in my life where I felt I had to add another ‘tool’ to keep my recovery going, and therapy was something I had been avoiding. Why? I am not too sure. Fear? Stigma? Pride? It may have been a mixture of all three, but I am happy that I finally got out of the way of myself.
Admitting that you may need to talk to someone is NOT a weakness. In fact, it has been because of my choice to see what therapy was all about that I have been able to see where more of my strengths lie. Before I chose to take this next step, I was one of the many people in the world who considered therapy to mean that something was seriously wrong with me. Oh, how wrong I was about that.
In this post, I hope to destigmatize the word ‘Therapy’ and let it be known that we should never feel ashamed about needing some kind of help. I recommend therapy to even the healthiest of people. There is nothing wrong with having an unbiased, professional opinion about our life, our truth, and our stories. We never know how beneficial something can be for us until we try it. Same goes for therapy.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!
5 years ago, today, I found myself in Jail Cell #11. My ‘roommate’ appeared to be a regular and very aware of the fact that I was terrified. Despite shame being a feeling I was familiar with; this was a level of shame that I had not yet experienced. Up until that humbling realization that I had put myself in jail, I had been pretty convinced that I was invincible; that I could get away with anything I set my mind to. Getting arrested was a pivotal moment in my life. It was through this time of desperation that I was able to make a step in the right direction.
Despite this incident being the motivation I needed to quit my addiction to amphetamines, the big question I was left with, was why did it always take desperation for me to want better for myself? Surely, there was another way to go about how I live my life.
In this post, I talk about the two motivating factors we all tend to lean on when it comes to making a change in our lives: Inspiration & Desperation. I beg the question of, why does desperation seem to be the most popular choice, and why is it that we wait until we are at our worst to want better? I am only speaking from experience here, but I guarantee all of us have an example of when we were inspired, and when we felt desperate. Since my arrest five years ago, I have slowly but surely begun learning how to choose inspiration over desperation. Isn’t it beautiful that we always have a choice?
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
It was not until recently that I discovered a root cause of all my toxic, and failed relationships: Codependency. You see, I have had no reason to define, or put a name to my own behaviors because when you are not aware of your own actions being toxic, you have no reason to think differently. It is very clear to me why I have always felt ‘less than’, or unable to please the people in my life, and it has so much to do with the codependent mindset I have developed from believing I had to put others above myself.
In this post, I share 5 important tools and skills I use on daily basis to help me become independent of my codependency. This is by no means the be-all, end-all, but it is a good start for those that may be struggling in their current relationships, and not necessarily know why. This post is to serve as an important reminder that you deserve to be treated the way you treat others and that you are allowed to set healthy boundaries, and standards for yourself, and YOUR happiness.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!
The word ‘alone’ gets a bad reputation because a lot of people tend to associate being alone with being lonely; that is simply not the case. Being alone is a choice; being lonely is a feeling. A feeling that we have the ability to change on our own!
It has been a full year since I made the decision to move away from home, and in that time, the term ‘alone’ has taken on a much different, and very important meaning in my life.
In this post, I share with you what I have learned thus far since choosing to be alone. When we are able to make decisions for ourselves, lead a life that fulfills us, and are able to find reasons to enjoy our own company, we quickly find out that being alone is quite the opposite of being lonely. In fact, choosing to stand alone just may be exactly what you need to figure out exactly who you are.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
My Mental Illness never fails to remind me that it has a key role in the way I live my everyday life. I still struggle with the fact that each day has its own set of challenges, but that is only because I still struggle to let go of what I cannot control. Having to accept that my mental health will always require a certain level of work has been challenging, because let’s be honest, mental illness can be exhausting.
In this post, I share TEN lessons my mental illness is still having to teach me about myself, or better yet, lessons I am still having to accept about my journey. We are all going to face our own set of challenges in life, and for a portion of the world, mental illness will be one of those battles. We cannot deny what we must face about ourselves, and the 10 lessons I talk about are just some of the truths I can no longer run from.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
How often do you find yourself doing things that keep you busy, but prevent you from being truly productive? If you are anything like me, you tend to procrastinate even the simplest of tasks as a way to avoid feeling overwhelmed by everyday responsibilities. Keep in mind that I am not writing this because I have the answers, I am writing this because I am guilty of it too. Guilty of what you ask? Of being in my own way.
In this post, I talk about some of the everyday examples where I have kept myself from moving forward. I also share some of the ways I have been able to pull myself out of my self-sabotaging procrastination that can often times, leave me feeling debilitated. This post is for anyone who may struggle to find the balance between what needs to be done, and what we want to accomplish.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
My life has always revolved around having certain ‘habits’, but it was not until my recovery that I started to learn (and accept) which habits were good for me, and which were bad; most of them being the latter. Because of this, I have spent the past couple years discovering which habits I could incorporate into my daily routine to make me a better person. What I have found thus far has been incredibly beneficial, not only in my recovery but just as a human being in general.
In this post, I share with you 5 daily habits that keep me on the right track, and I go over what each habit has done for my life since making it an everyday priority. We are all going to face tougher days in life, but it can be the daily habits we choose for ourselves that keep us afloat when the going gets tough. These may not all work for you, but I think all are worth giving a shot!
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
It was not until this year that I truly paid any attention to International Women’s Day. I know what you are probably thinking, ‘How could a woman not pay attention to a day that is dedicated to the achievement of being a Woman?’ Well, for one, it was not until recently that I even granted myself the permission to own, and accept the accomplishment of what I feel it means to be a ‘Woman’. So, when International Women’s Day came around this time of year, it gave me an opportunity to really think about the word ‘Woman’ and what it means to me, as well as what it has meant to me in the past.
In this post, I try to piece together the many moments in my life that I have felt like a Woman, but also, the many moments where I am taken back, and able to feel like that scared little girl I have once been. This post is not about ‘Feminism’ or however YOU choose to define that word. This post is simply just my perspective of being a female, a girl, and most recently, a Woman. A title that I fought off for quite some time, but am finally starting to see the beauty in what it actually means to appreciate it.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
If you have ever found yourself in a toxic relationship, then you know the daily battle of what it takes to recover from a period of destructive behavior. Whether done unto us or self-inflicted, the way we treat ourselves when involved with toxic people is what can leave us with the most damage. It is often times easier for the abused to put the blame on themselves for how they are being treated, and by justifying the behavior of the toxic person, we are silently granting them permission to keep treating us in a toxic manner. You are allowed to change this. In fact, YOU are allowed to leave ANYTHING toxic!
In this post, I hope to restore the fact to everyone that we have always had control over our choices. When we can take a step back, and reevaluate how it is we are being treated, we can get honest with ourselves and recognize if we are giving much more than we are receiving. You do NOT have to settle for anyone who happens to cross your path, especially if that person is toxic to you in any way. It is important for all of us to remember that we are allowed to leave ANYTHING toxic!
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!
The idea for this post didn’t come to me because of good news I received, but because of the opposite. The news of an old friend passing caused me to take a deeper look into loss and what it has meant for me over the years. Although this is a much tougher topic to cover, I always feel that it’s necessary to explore both the ups and downs of life, because like my title says, with life comes loss, and we must learn to accept that one cannot happen without the other.
In this post, I talk about loss in a way that hopefully offers you a lighter way of looking at something so dark. Not that we should become numb to it happening, but instead, we should live our days moving forward believing that our life is for something greater than the pain we experience. If we allow the darker times to consume us completely, we take the risk of forgetting just how beautiful life can be when we are able to learn from it!
This post is not only dedicated to my friend who is now in peace, but also, to any, and all families that have been impacted by the violence that has been occurring...everywhere quite frankly. We live in a scary world, but we cannot allow the world to make us afraid to live!
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
When it comes to taking chances or pursuing something that is important to us, it can be easy to fall victim to negative self-talk, and engage in thoughts that are not beneficial to you in any way. It is amazing how many times I have been able to justify a habit of mine just so I can remain comfortable and in control of where I am at in my life. When we find something that works for us ‘just enough’ it is important that we are not allowing certain opportunities to pass us by.
In this post, I talk about ‘Opportunity’ and what it really means to pay attention to the path you are meant to travel in your life. I like to believe that the world is always showing us where to go next; whether or not we listen is up to us. I felt that it was important for me to share what I have learned from attempting to answer all opportunities that are thrown my way.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
We all know the saying, ‘Actions speak louder than words!’ but how many of us are actually applying that into our everyday lives? I know I am guilty of having a great idea, talking about wanting to make it happen, but then allowing life to get in the way, and realizing a couple months later that I forgot all about my ‘great idea’. It is one of those things where, unfortunately, it is easier said than done. So, how can we go about changing that?
In this post, I talk about the importance of OUR ACTIONS and how the everyday choices, and routines we develop lead to the RESULT of who will become. When it comes to change, and pursuing the goals we want to achieve, eventually we have to stop talking about it and do the things that allow us to become it.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.
