Relationship

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5 Ways to Become Independent of Your Codependency!

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5 Ways to Become Independent of Your Codependency!

It was not until recently that I discovered a root cause of all my toxic, and failed relationships: Codependency. You see, I have had no reason to define, or put a name to my own behaviors because when you are not aware of your own actions being toxic, you have no reason to think differently. It is very clear to me why I have always felt ‘less than’, or unable to please the people in my life, and it has so much to do with the codependent mindset I have developed from believing I had to put others above myself.

In this post, I share 5 important tools and skills I use on daily basis to help me become independent of my codependency. This is by no means the be-all, end-all, but it is a good start for those that may be struggling in their current relationships, and not necessarily know why. This post is to serve as an important reminder that you deserve to be treated the way you treat others and that you are allowed to set healthy boundaries, and standards for yourself, and YOUR happiness.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!   

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You are Allowed to Leave Anything Toxic!

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You are Allowed to Leave Anything Toxic!

If you have ever found yourself in a toxic relationship, then you know the daily battle of what it takes to recover from a period of destructive behavior. Whether done unto us or self-inflicted, the way we treat ourselves when involved with toxic people is what can leave us with the most damage. It is often times easier for the abused to put the blame on themselves for how they are being treated, and by justifying the behavior of the toxic person, we are silently granting them permission to keep treating us in a toxic manner. You are allowed to change this. In fact, YOU are allowed to leave ANYTHING toxic!
 
In this post, I hope to restore the fact to everyone that we have always had control over our choices. When we can take a step back, and reevaluate how it is we are being treated, we can get honest with ourselves and recognize if we are giving much more than we are receiving. You do NOT have to settle for anyone who happens to cross your path, especially if that person is toxic to you in any way. It is important for all of us to remember that we are allowed to leave ANYTHING toxic!
 
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!    

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(Please) STOP ‘Looking’ For Love…It Will Find YOU!

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(Please) STOP ‘Looking’ For Love…It Will Find YOU!

Now that February is here, I wanted to start off strong with a ‘love’ post, since that tends to be the common theme this month, with Valentine’s Day right around the corner. This can stir up a mixture of emotions within people depending on their current relationship status, or situation. Regardless of if you are currently in a relationship, boycotting them, or wanting to be in one, the message within this post is for anyone!

In this post, I talk about ‘love’ and the injustice we are doing ourselves by looking for it in all the wrong places, settling for it because we think we need someone, or hoping for it because we believe it will fill a void. I talk about the differences between loneliness and being alone, and hopefully, you will leave this article with the important message of self-love, and why we should ever only focus on that kind of love in the first place.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you!

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Do NOT Be Afraid to OUTGROW People!

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Do NOT Be Afraid to OUTGROW People!

A good friend of mine asked me recently, “How do you know when to let go of people?” And it truly made me stop and think for a bit. That is a good question, and it has been a thought that I haven’t been able to get off my mind since. What better way to get to the bottom of how I feel about this topic than by writing it out?

In this post, I discuss what I have learned about letting go of people through this recovery process of mine. As I took the time to reflect on my life thus far, I had the intense realization that I am still not that great at letting go, but I am certainly much better than I was in the past. When we can accept that not all connections are meant to last forever, we can move forward with the lives that we were always meant to live.

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you. 

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Heartbreak: The Gift I Never Asked for, but a Gift Nonetheless!

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Heartbreak: The Gift I Never Asked for, but a Gift Nonetheless!

Unless you are one of the lucky ones who got it right the first time, you have most likely had to endure the pain that comes from heartbreak. Regardless of where you are in the process of coping with that, I am here to tell you that heartbreak ended up being one of the most cherished, and greatest gifts I could have ever been given. Heartbreak can be felt through all kinds of avenues; not just in the romantic sense. 

In this post, I share why the loss of love has been one of the most beneficial life lessons for me, and why I no longer consider heartbreak to be such an ugly experience. Instead, I find it to be a gift, and one that we should embrace, accept, and ultimately, grow from.  

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.   

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It's A Hopeless Time to Be A Hopeless Romantic!

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It's A Hopeless Time to Be A Hopeless Romantic!

Dating in this day and age has become much more complicated than it needs to be, and it certainly has changed drastically in the last 10 years alone. Whatever happened to being able to strike up a conversation with a stranger, or letting someone know how you feel about them without playing games? With online dating apps becoming the social norm, it has become a difficult time for 'hopeless romantics' to find that good old fashioned story you now only read about, or see in movies. 

In this post, I talk about some of the frustrations I have come across with dating apps, and I provide a positive perspective for those who may be feeling a bit hopeless. 

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.

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Setting Boundaries Is Not Selfish; It's Survival!

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Setting Boundaries Is Not Selfish; It's Survival!

One of the hardest challenges we must face in life is learning how to set boundaries within our relationships. What makes it so hard is the fact that we have grown so used to being a certain way, that it can feel like we are learning to walk again once we decide to put our foot down. Unfortunately, most people will never learn to set necessary boundaries, and I do not want you to fall into that category.
 
In this post, we will talk about recognizing when we need to take a step back and reevaluate some of the unhealthy boundaries we have in place currently. It is not selfish to value the relationship you have with yourself and to notice when you may be giving up too much of who you are. Creating boundaries is essential to your happiness, and it is a means of surviving this often, cruel world.
 
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.

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You Were Whole Before Someone Made You Feel Broken!

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You Were Whole Before Someone Made You Feel Broken!

Out of all the messages I receive, the most frequent question I get asked is, “How were you able to heal a broken heart?” It is no secret that I have felt “broken” before since my journey with writing started when I was in a very depressed state from the loss of someone I never intended on losing.
 
When I started sharing my words with the world three years ago, I was just a sad girl who was only looking for a way to heal her ‘brokenness’. What I learned in the process was something I never expected: I discovered that I had been a whole person all along and that it was up to me to brush myself off, repair the damage done, and find the love I had lost for myself while giving it to someone else.
 
In this post, I remind those out there who are suffering from feeling broken that they have always been whole; it was just ourselves that convinced us of anything different.
 
Thank you for reading. I appreciate you. 

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The Role of 'Best Friend' is One of the Most Important!

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The Role of 'Best Friend' is One of the Most Important!

How many of you knew that #NationalBestFriendDay was this past week? (How many of you knew that there is a #NationalDay for practically everything?) I have always been a big supporter of this day specifically, and it is because I think the role of a ‘best friend’ needs to be celebrated more. Despite being proud of the independence I have created for myself, the ‘best friend’s’ I have in my life are a huge part of my strong personal foundation.

In this post, I talk about the importance of friendship, and I explain why the role of a ‘best friend’ should be celebrated on more than just one day. In a world that is constantly challenging our every move, thought, and belief, it is nice to know that there is someone out there who makes our world a better place. 

Thank you for reading. I appreciate you.

Let Go of Who Let Go of You

Let Go of Who Let Go of You

Heart break is hard, and what is even harder, is letting go of the person in charge of our pain, but why? Why is it so hard for us to move on, when it appears that it was so easy for them?

Heartbreak, although painful, was one of the best life lessons I could have ever learned.  

In this post, I discuss some of the steps you should take when it comes to moving on, and ultimately, letting go of the person who let go of you.